[NVC Day 18] -- [Sometimes All You Can Do is Breathe] -- [Kirk/Bones]

[kirktastic]

After everything that had happened the last few days, whatever had infected him and boiled his blood on top of his stress about the new bond and the trial... Jim was starting to fall back into bad habits Bones had been trying to break of him for years. He didn't want to eat as it only added to the cramping in his stomach, and sleep... it either didn't come, or it came in fits.

There was just too much in his head, spinning endlessly. He sat there on the deck, back up against the wall of the building, with a PADD half propped up in his lap. Why did Vulcans have to be so damn exclusive about things? It was making his search for a healer, something to try and help them figure out what they needed to know about, and what they could do about, the bond. The last thing he needed was information spreading out about what had happened with Spock, honestly wasn't even happy with the idea of being caught going to the healer at all. Caught? What am I, sneaking out of the house? Jim almost laughed to himself.

He closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wall, thinking. There had to be a way. Bones probably could contact someone, maybe even knew someone who could find someone else, but it had to be someone... they could trust. Maybe, more specifically, someone Jim could trust. This all felt too much like having to go see a psych. Way, way too much like having to see a psych. He'd have to talk to Bones about it, and they'd have to figure it out together. It was the only real chance they had to go about this without half of the planet and the media knowing, at least in Jim's mind.

He didn't want to have to think about what was coming up for the day. They had passed along the information along to him... he would be testifying today. The sheer idea of it had his stomach curling up on itself, the bones in his hand threatening to scream at him. He didn't want to sleep; the idea of nightmares about all that had happened were worse than the nightmares themselves.

At least the sunsets were beautiful on Sha'Kwai. The sunrises, coming up over the ocean, were more so.

He got up and put the PADD side, walking down to the sands and down the sands to the beach and down the beach to the water. He dropped his robe just outside of the water's range, then stepped into the lukewarm water. It felt like almost neutral-temperatured water, like a bath left too cool. He dove into the water.

(OOC: This is running on the premise that the trial was postponed for two days until the sexpop was dealt with, as well as this happens after a tread that will be coming up.)

Comments

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

...Bones was using that look on him. That look. Jim couldn't say no to it, even though his stomach clenched with it. "You sure you wanna deal with the media too?" Bones had stayed mostly silent on their return to Earth after the thing with Nero and Vulcan, Jim had dealt with the media the best he could.

[dctr-mccoy.livejournal.com]

No, Bones did not fucking want to deal with the media, but that was beside the point. He only wished he could make them all go away. Today was gonna be hard enough as it was without them.

Hopefully the Vulcans might have some control of the lot of them. It was a small hope. He dug a belt out of the closet and threaded it through his beltloops, buckling it with more concentration than the task really needed.

When Bones finally looked up at Jim, he asked, "You ready?" and reached for his hand.

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

Easy answer. "Fuck no, but let's do it anyway." Jim only squeezed Bones' hand for a second before he let go, then... hesitated.

He looked down at his hand, and said very quietly, "...Bones, how the hell... do I explain the tattoos I kept?"

[dctr-mccoy.livejournal.com]

"Just like you explained it to me, Jim. No one's gonna give you shit about that." How could anyone understand, anyone who hadn't been there, seen it all. "Doesn't make you crazy, if that's what you think."

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

Somehow, Jim wasn't as sure of that 'not crazy' fact as Bones sounded. His hand flexed again and he nodded, heading out the door. He wanted it to be tomorrow already.

The walk there was quiet and all too quick. Out in front was, as predicted, absolute fucking chaos. Jim looked to Bones just once before the media realized just who was there and surrounded them like a pack of wolves.

[dctr-mccoy.livejournal.com]

Fuck, it was like Earth after the Narada incident the first time. Only this time, there weren't Starfleet people there to help them. Just the two of them.

Leaning in close, they put their heads down and made their way through the crowd. Bones was trying not to lose his tempter, that would be bad, but all that mattered was getting Jim inside the building.

With a final push they made it up the stairs, Vulcan security finally creating enough of a wall for them to get inside. "Jesus, why isn't someone taking care of that?" he growled, as close to Jim as he could be without looking improper. "You okay?" he asked, looking over him with his eyes.

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

"I'm fine." Jim's eyes were different then Bones was used to seeing. Harder, almost gray compared to their normal brilliant blue. "I'll see you back at the hotel?" He finally really looked at Bones for a second, their fingers brushing but unable to grasp for each other in this of all places.

[dctr-mccoy.livejournal.com]

"Yeah," he told him, letting his index finger linger, pressed it against Jim's before letting go. Fuck what anyone thought.

Bones start walking, heading out the back door this time. A few steps and he stopped, turning to look back. "Give 'em hell, Jim."

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

"Yea." Jim nodded once, then turned and went into the courtroom. Give 'em hell... right now, it was all he could do to breathe. (http://kirktastic.livejournal.com/46520.html)