[Prisoners in the Brig] -- [Kirk, Ayel, and Nero]

[kirktastic]

Kirk took the time to read himself. He had a feeling he was going to need it, to keep his calm. The tattoos were gone, leaving behind only faintly pinked lines that Bones swore would fade to white then fade even further. Only the ones along his left arm stayed, with Vulcan visible from his wrist over his hand. The ones he had asked for, his own story, his own personal grief that he knew from not one, not two, but three sides. His own, the oldest of the Spocks, and Nero's. Each conflicting, each painful, each one right in its own method which did nothing but piss him off a little.

Kirk felt his left hand start to ache as if it knew who he was going to talk to. He had the knowledge that they were girls, and a fast look at the security cameras had confirmed that. It was weird. They had hair. He just had to do this, see them in the brig, tell them the basics of what would be happening to them, and then he wouldn't have to see them until he testified at their hearing.

He could do this. Had to do this.

Kirk gestured for the guard to let down the first field, which let him continue down the hall. Ayel's cell would be closer to him, with Nero as far away as possible to keep the two from communicating. He walked up to the field, and looked inside, studying Ayel quickly before the other noticed (he hoped.)

Comments

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

"This barrier'll make sure you stay there. We fought already once, Ayel. I won. I don't want you crew." His fingers flexed, "Mine still lives, because I chose to protect them instead of take revenge."

[mirror-brightly.livejournal.com]

Talking. They were talking, bleeding through the air and the light and the back of his skull. His eyes were closed hard, kept out the meaningless white, the blue that had no flavor, no sound. His head was burning with words and letters----that clattered in circles through the air.

He could hear Naele, her commands were harder when she loomed, when she waited for him.

"Quiet! All of you!" The words hit the wall, Lloannsu sounded strange, resounded with the only times she'd spoken it to him. It was too loud. He needed out, wanted out. "I'm here with you, just...be silent!"

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

The shout spooked him. He'd never admit it, but when every bit of him was keyed up in determination when talking with Ayel? The sudden shout hit at his fight-or-flight reaction like a hammer to a nail. He jumped, hand flailing out to catch himself--

He saw Ayel's movement at the same time. The run forward at the barrier, heedless of his own safety--

Those words!

His hand hit the force field just as Ayel's body slammed into it. The vaguest awareness of crackling, a flare of pain, all noticing compared to the voices in his head.

Safe! Always, I promise--

You can fix anything. After all, you fixed me.

Help me up. We should run.

Stay with me, baby. Stay with me. Don't die. Don't die. Don't die.

[loyalty-ever.livejournal.com]

I don't want your crew.

He heard nothing, saw nothing else, thought of nothing but knocking those words down Kirk's teeth.

"D'nrai!"

It cut the air beyond him just as he hit the field, just as it sparked with outside touch, sizzled with backlash and the magnesium flare of Kirk's hand.

It wasn't Ayel's voice. Not his, no, and not Sharra's. It was like before--his captain shouting even as Ayel scrambled to cover him, to protect him...from himself?

Off! Off! He'll hurt you, not safe, let go!

Too close, too much, too loud. It burned, it burned. He was hurt again.

Just hurt. Not shot. He wasn't a Bones.

Bones was real--was a real person that Kirk knew, knew and counted on. No wonder he'd backed away; his heart was already taken, whether he knew it or not.

It wasn't a dream. It had really happened...some of it had really happened.

And that shout--was it real?

""

Some of it had been a dream.

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

Both of them fell back, and despite every difference that lay between them, they temporarily wore matching facial expressions of shock. It took Kirk only a second to understand the words. "Ie." Yes, yes he did hear him. His hand was throbbing painfully, but it was a distant feeling compared to realization.

The realization that Ael felt like Bones. Bones... Bones... Bones had been shot, he'd been determined to get him out, to safety...

Bones himself had said it. He hadn't been on the Narada...

[mirror-brightly.livejournal.com]

Rihannsu now, shifting languages, shifting lights. He could see them through his eyelids, feel them. He knew that voice, Sharra, half cocked in harsh sizzling buzz. He smelled flesh, didn't dare open his eyes. The white would be twisting, something else was there.

he answered slow, low against the wall, pitched to keep Naele out of his throat, away from his head. It didn't work.

[loyalty-ever.livejournal.com]

Not his captain after all. It hadn't been Nero sprawled across him sick and hurting, who had clung to him, broken on the floor. Not his captain. This one. James Kirk. Jim. Ayel had reached for Jim, who felt like home, like safety, for a moment's time.

Who knew enough Rihannsu to answer him in it.

Ayel was, suddenly, exhausted. Sharra had coiled tight, knotted muscles in places he wasn't used to. Her hand stayed a strong green where it had touched the field, blistered underneath the skin. It twinged sharply if he even looked at it too hard.

Bones was real.

You fixed me.

""

There was a hint of wonder, of weakness, in it, and Ayel braced himself on the wall. He was too stiff to stand properly, Sharra's skin still prickling around him like it wanted to climb up off his--her?--their back.

He wasn't going to collapse in front of Kirk. Not even if he was sometimes Jim.

Was it his voice? He knew some Romulan. No. No. Something, someone else, down far away in the wall, wanted them to stop shouting.

All of you. Everyone, everyone who screamed without making a sound.

There was only one other Rihann aboard this ship. He would--did--stake his life on that.

But they couldn't talk--that was a way barred with cell checks, with questions that meant nothing, sneering disregard from behind dark ridged helmets.

At least there were none of his crew left to hurt. It was a cold mercy.

""

Soft, but strong enough to carry, for Kirk and the wall both.

Ayel narrowed her eyes, drew her brows down tight. Sharra had a scowl that stopped foremen in their tracks.

"You should go to him."

That was all for Jim--not a threat. Just a fact. He would need to keep safe everything that mattered to him.

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

Staring at Ayel, it took time to process the words each time Ayel spoke. The words felt like they had to pass through a thick barrier to get to whatever part of his brain did translations. I'm his? Whose?

"Who?" Kirk whispered before he could stop the word, but he knew without having to ask. Bones had been on that ship... or at least, the memory of Bones had.

Nero, down the hall, was ignored. His hand throbbed as it hung limp against his side, bright red and he wouldn't be surprised if it was blistering.

[loyalty-ever.livejournal.com]

He had to know. It wasn't only Ayel's dream--hallucination--memory? Something. They had shared it.

Hadn't they? Had he chosen the wrong words? Maybe the facial expression was wrong. Maybe it had to be softly given to be true.

"Bones. Your Bones."

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

Bones. Not Leo, not Leonard, not Lenny, not McCoy, not even Doctor. Bones. He was the only person in the world that called him Bones. Not just Bones but your Bones. His. "How... how do you know about Bones?" He whispered, fingers clenching into a fist on his other hand.

He thought about what Ayel had said before, "What gives you the right to say his name any more than I have the right to say Mandana's?"

[loyalty-ever.livejournal.com]

Now. Now he had Kirk's attention. No more 'dishonor' and 'Vulcan' and 'look what you've done' as if his eyes had been closed the whole time.

Now they were talking personally.

Ayel tilted his head--felt Sharra's hair moving, falling a little even though it was short, brushing at him.

"Does it trouble you? Is there a chill down your back?" Lowered lashes fluttered closed. "Excuse, please. This is the only name I know. Bones."

He was really starting to like the feel of it in his mouth. And the look it put on Kirk's face.

"Take good care of him."

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

"I think more like you're a giant hypocrite," Kirk snapped, but he couldn't show that weakness in front of Ayel. He did take good care of Bones, or at least tried. "You shouldn't know that name at all. I didn't give it to you."

[loyalty-ever.livejournal.com]

"But you did. You called me this name when we fell. Pinned it on me, I think Feds say."

He was pretty sure it had happened.

I don't even know who this is, and I was him for you.

He couldn't quite remember. Just--frantic to get away, to find the way out; he was hurt, sick, had to protect him. Fix him.

"Do you want it back?" Oh, this was a shameful request, but too good to pass up. "Will you give me yours instead?"

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

He was no fool. This was a custom he didn't understand, and wasn't about to mess with. "First you'd have to explain it to me." He didn't plan on giving Ayel anything, certainly not something as important as this seemed to be, but it was something he wanted to be able to explain to Starfleet when they got there. "What does it mean to give one's name, and how could someone give it back?"

[loyalty-ever.livejournal.com]

Kirk wouldn't be tricked by lashes, by a low voice. But Ayel had already been asked to be quiet. Quieter. It could be done.

Sharra's hand throbbed at him, raw, angry, and the room was too bright.

Earth and Air, give me the right words.

"Not until--" her tongue was ashes, sticking against his teeth. He'd wanted Kirk's name before he insisted this--too greedy, and it had turned back on him.

"I want my name. Return it, and I'll tell you. I'll swear to it." Saying that felt like licking the field, scalding and dry. "But you have to give me my name. Hell! I'll sign for it, if you want a written oath. "

And if you'll actually give me electronics, you deserve what will happen to your computer banks.

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

"I can't give you a damn thing until you tell me," Kirk challenged with narrowed eyes and a strong voice. Here, here... he was not their prisoner, not drugged and broken. A captain, what he as supposed to be.

"You have to tell me to get anything back," He met Ayel's firmly, "Until then, I have your name, your Captain's name, and her name."

[loyalty-ever.livejournal.com]

He almost snarled not the one that matters. Bit down hard on Sharra's tongue to keep it from escaping.

She was Fire and Air, like this room. The lights, the field. Too quick, too hot-tempered.

He looked down, rounded his shoulders a little.

"Swear you'll do it after I say, then. Promise me on the life of your Bones. And I'll tell."

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

"Would you promise anything to your enemy on the blood of your Captain?" Kirk asked in retort. "I will promise you nothing, but I will hold to your names for the rest of existence if you tell me nothing."

[loyalty-ever.livejournal.com]

Federation promises are worthless, anyway.

"Fine. James. Done." He let out a long, shaky breath.

Leave out all the other names, Kirk only had the heart's name, the strongest name--no reason to give him any of the others, or any knowing he might cut another Rihann with.

"That is who I am. Understand? Like--" what was it, some barbarity Klingons would have done, "like cutting my hand off, so you can use it to fake an ident scan. But worse. Thief."

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

"Your name is who you are." Pause, consider, "Your true name? ...Not Ayel. You gave us a fake one instead of your true? You mean use it to speak to other people?" He was trying to understand, ignoring his throbbing hand. "Why did Nero give me your name and his?"

[loyalty-ever.livejournal.com]

I don't want to know why. Sometimes he talks like we were always dead. That's when I'm afraid.

"Ayel is the name that most call me. The other--is a very close name." He leaned to keep from falling over. "You would call me that name if you loved me." A little huff of anger, a tiny hopeless laugh. "It's not just insulting. It's sick."

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

Well, it was something to know. He'd tell Starfleet this information when they arrived. "Humans don't have two--" He stopped. Suddenly, he understood. Humans did have two names. People called him Captain, Kirk, James... but only the people he cared about called him Jim. And Bones... he was the only person who called McCoy Bones. A very close name.

Humans were freer with those names, but didn't they all have something like that? "I see, Ayel."

He stepped back once, "You both will be turned over to Starfleet, and they will decide your punishment. You'll be able to explain yourself, your reasonings, your defense, or proclaim your guilt if you want." Distance yourself, Jim. Just fucking do it.

[loyalty-ever.livejournal.com]

"My name. I'll return his." The words were small, tight, pushing the edge of human hearing. "For mine."

Don't keep it.

"Fair is fair?"

That was how they said it.

The rest was--not unimportant, but expected, known to him. Some form of the Right of Statement.

The truth would be told. .

He'd never said he would be there to tell it. A word not given could not be broken.

[kirktastic.livejournal.com]

"Your name is scarred forever in my skin," Kirk's voice was tight, "I cannot give it back completely. Your captain made sure of that, for all time." It was quiet, blunt, and as truthful as he could get with Ayel. "How could I trust your honor? In my eyes, you have no honor. Spock believed in your honor until the moment you destroyed his world."

[loyalty-ever.livejournal.com]

His honor. His honor-- what was left without it? And James would always doubt.

He'd spoken fairly; Kirk did the same.

"You can't," said Ayel, soft, final. "Maybe you never will."

"I don't have anything you want."

It was a low purr through licked lips--discourteous, vile, but effective. Whore's paint over the wound, sealing over doubt.

"Except his name. Why would I lie?" He craned Sharra's neck, arching. There would be time to explain his misuse of her self in the afterworld, if he were lucky. Her hips tilted differently, too low down, but they made the same kind of fluid motion. "On the worth of a strong, solid name like his? I can swear it for you on his name."

He grinned, a razor smile. "I won't lie. It's a good one. Was it always his? Was it a present?"

That was the ragged edge of what honor allowed. And the offer, while backhanded, was genuine.

The only thing Kirk valued was his Bones. A promise on that name was good.